Randomocity

Hello, my readers!

I am overly hyper, so I thought I'd share with you what is in my head at the moment, and why exactly it is there. Let the random escapade begin:

Toxic by Brittney Spears.
Ok, so I know it sounds lame, but have any of you heard the Glee version of this famous song? Its amazing!
Here's the youtube link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ighs9gjIXQ

Weekend rush:
Or lack there of. The reason for this? I haven't had a weekend to kick back and just chill out in weeks...its depressing. Especially considering I work full time, have a maxed schedule, and only have the weekend to hang out...

Belting it out:
Besides the fact that I'm currently spinning Glee? (I swear, I am no obsessed) My sister and I used to sing Phantom of the Opera, and I absolutely loved being the Phantom, because I could sing as loud and powerfully as I could. This weekend, I get to rehearse and sing with the people from Summit Church. And I get to belt it.

Singing in General:
I love doing any kind of singing. It doesn't matter if I'm center stage, or just do harmony. I love the way voices blend together in a perfect cord. It makes me feel like I'm a part of something bigger then I could ever be. There is a certain joy attained from it...for me at least.

Starbucks:
Well...its payday and it's not Coffee Friday...I want my Carmel Macchiato.

My Guy:
Need I say more?

Adventuring:
Because I need one.

So that was just a small peek into my overly hyper, randomized mind...had I more time, I could probably go one forever.

So, it is with out further ado, I wish you, all my Readers, a very Happy Friday.
Enjoy:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bR3K5uB-wMA

The Wondering Mind

Feeling Silly

I hate feeling silly when I try new things and they just don't work out.

Like when you try to wear a different style shoe that you thought looked great with your favorite jeans, and you just feel uncomfortable all day.

Or you try a new hairstyle, just to mix it up, and it gets either completely ignored, or you get asked "what happened to your hair?"

Or you try being nice to someone, and they ask what's wrong with you.

Or you try a new recipe for your family, spend a whole bunch of time testing and thinking and preparing, and it doesn't come out right. And then your mom kindly says "Its just missing something" as she grimaces with the first bite.

Or the time you work on your hand writing, and then people say they can't read it.

Or that new program for organization just doesn't work out. Or a better one exists.

Or you tried something new, and people just rejected it.

I understand that you will never know unless you try...but it sure does feel uncomfortable...and I cry when I get embarrassed. Which is even more embarrassing.

Anybody feel the same?

Cherrio,
The Wondering Mind

God-Given Talent

Have you ever noticed how insecure people are?

So insecure that they fail to use the gift God gave them?

I know someone with an incredible singing voice who refuses to sing in public. Its not that he's shy, because he sings with me all the time. He just doesn't believe his voice is as wonderful as it really is.

The thing is, when he sings the Phantom of the Opera, it makes the hair on the back of my neck stand on end and sends a chill down my spine. But he doesn't think he's good enough.

He can pick up a tenor harmony if I sing melody, and hold it. A cappella.

He has a voice that belongs on Broadway, and can sing any show tune I throw at him. In a manly way, of course.  He is incredible with modern music, like Jason Mraz or Micheal Buble. And yet, he still doesn't think he's good enough.

Why is that? He says no one ever told him he had an incredible voice. Everyone was so focused on his older brother's singing "talent", they dismissed the younger. But wouldn't his desire be to prove himself the better of the two?

He refuses sing in public until he gets some "formal training". And yet, he declines to talk to the people who could train him for free. And yet, he doesn't need any more training. He's amazing already, his voice a perfect blend of pitch and tone.

So, what is my point?

This young man has a natural talent in an area that few will ever achieve. But he's so insecure about how he sounds and what people will think, that he refuses to use his God given gift...I wish he would. He would be surprised about what people have to say.

God says to use what He gave us. And I know He gave this young man his voice for a reason. So why not take a risk, belt it out, and watch the surprise on everyone else's face?

Thank God its Coffee Friday

Today is Coffee Friday. Most of you can probably figure out what that means, but allow me to expound on my new found tradition and its history.

I used to be a caffeine junky. No, I was and never will be a loyal fan of rockstars or monsters. The single time I attempted a sip, so revolting did I find the taste I was almost bowing to the porcelain god. Give me a Pepsi or a coke, however, and watch the pure state of bliss that settled over my face as I took the first sip. On the way to school, I found myself stopping in at Starbucks, and to my utter horror, ordering my own personal brand of herione. It got so bad, I found my self immune to the effects it should have had on my sleep. Even worse then that, I watched as I became irritable and sleepy if I missed a dose.

And then one day, I looked around and thought, "why am I drinking all of this?" With that, I decided to quit cold turkey. Let the head ache begin. Literally.

So know, instead of having coffee and Pepsi every day, I have Coffee Friday. Its a little reward to myself for getting through the week between paydays. I so look forward to this twice a month, that it has a special place of honor in my date book. You would feel the same if you could but taste the carmelly goodness I so enjoy.

So, now I simply thank God for Iced Grande Soy Carmel Macchiato's, Upside down, Extra Carmel :)

Much Love,
The Wondering Mind

ps. Starbucks is trying to take over the world

Insert page break here

I just recently realized that I don't really have to post mind shattering, life-defining posts on my blog. It can be only a few short paragraphs, a small journal, even, concerning the things I notice about life around. This is extremely refreshing, considering I usually start writing a blog, get half way done, and then get distracted by the "gainful employment" I am currently engaged in. The result: about 20 unfinished blog posts and an twinge of regret that my readers, if I have any, never see them. They are all deeply profound...but I just never finish them.

You should know that I am now working a full time job to save for University. Turns out you actually need money to go to school, and its impossible to get any from the government if your me. Aka, white, citizen, with middle class parents. I'm still going to be a history professor someday. But right now, its off the work house to discover what real life is all about.

I miss winter break. (Insert cry here)

Any way, I won't make any promises, but I'm hoping you, as my readers, will be seeing a lot more of me.

With much love,
The Wondering Mind

This Country

What kind of a country do we live in? You know, I used to think that this was a place of freedom. I used to think this was a country, where, like my home, I could speak my mind, and not get ridiculed for what I had to say. I used to think I could make something of myself and be somebody in this country. I used to think I had a say in the happenings taking place in our nations capital. I used to think I could make a difference.

How naive I was, for I am a simply girl. 

I am not a Mexican illegal. I am not "African-American". I am a white girl, of European decent, born and raised right here in California, The US of A.

I am not poor. I do not collect un-employment, and neither do my parents. I still live at home and therefore make enough to buy my own car and live comfortably.

My parents are not lower-class citizens. My dad is a successful business owner, who makes enough for us to at least attempt a life of some comfort.

I am not a part of any union. I actually work for my money. I believe in the independence of women, but not at the expense of their children.

I am not lesbian. I am heterosexual, and no, I do not question my orientation...I like guys. I like how they look, smell, and taste, and how they want to take care of me and mine.

I am not Atheist, Muslim, Jewish, Hindu, into Scientology, or whatever else you want to peg on the religion list. I am a Christian, who has an unwavering faith in God.

In short, I am your average middle-class American. So why is this all a bad thing?

Because I literally have no voice. I used to think that I could say what I thought. But no. In college, they tell you that all views are respected in the class room. But they are not. A lesbian can get up and talk about her relationship with her girlfriend, but I can't get up and tell everyone how wonderful being a hetero is. They make you question every little thing. Your foundation of belief and trust can be destroyed with a single class of American Government. But if I question this....it is simply not allowed.

I can't get money to go to school because I am just a middle class white girl. My parents make to much, and I'm to European. Never mind that I'm the youngest of 10. Never mind that my GPA is amazing for someone who's been in community college for as long as I have.

But the guy whose parents ran here from their country, with not legality, can get everything, EVERYTHING for FREE! Tuition. Books. Entrance to State. Not me...I take a year off just to save to go to University.

I used to think that I had a say in what happened in this great nations fair capital. Do I? Why not, you ask? Have any of you noticed, my fair blog readers, that this government is doing things that none of us would agree to? Never mind the healthcare bill. Lets talk taxes. Lets talk the countries deficit, that keeps getting worse. And why? Because this government is funding all these groups and programs that I, as a white European American, can not get into.

Why is every time I bring up politics at the dinner table, everyone either gets upset or starts crying? Because we are desolate. We are disillusioned with our government and our country. We can do nothing to change where our country is.

I guess, all my bloggers out there that I hope read this...I guess what I'm saying is that I'm frustrated. I find that I can do nothing. I am seen as just a 20-something who doesn't really have her head screwed on right. You have to have age and money to get things done in this world...of which I have neither. And I feel as though the whole of the world works against me, simply for the means of having someone to work against. This government is failing...even I can see it. 

I'm not inciting a revolution...but I'm not so sure its a bad idea. 

If you read this, and feel the same way....then just know, you aren't alone. There is at least one person out there who feels as you do.